Shrimp Tacos

This one also came directly out of Cooking Light’s August 2013 issue.  I’ll be honest- the corn relish makes this thing happen. More specifically, the lime juice in the corn relish makes this thing happen. The flavor was fresh and the meal was not heavy at all. Very light and delicious for summer. I highly recommend making it now while corn is still fresh on the market!!

2 cups fresh corn kernels (about 2 ears- please note that the original recipe called for 1 cup. I frankly  just felt this wasn’t enough and after making it, I was right. I’m glad I went with the 2 cups for 3 people)

1 ½ teaspoons olive oil

2 tablespoons chopped green onions

2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro (I didn’t add this in, but left it on the side for people to decide. Also, I gave an option for parsley instead. If you want to pick one, I will say that the cilantro was the better option with the lime juice)

3 tablespoons fresh lime juice, divided

¼ teaspoon salt

¼ teaspoon freshly ground pepper

1 diced peeled avocado

Cooking Spray

1 pound medium shrimp, peeled and deveined

2 teaspoons honey

¼ cup light sour cream

8 corn tortillas (I got gluten free)

Preheat boiler to high (I had mine set on 550, although my pan started to warp, so I’d probably go to 400F next time). Combine corn and oil in small bowl; toss gently to coat. Arrange corn in an even layer on a jelly-roll pan; broil 6 minutes or until lightly browned. Combine corn, onions, cilantro, 1 tablespoon juice, salt, pepper, and avocado in a medium bowl; toss gently.

Heat a large grill pan over medium high heat. Coat pan with cooking spray. Combine shrimp, 1 tablespoon juice, and honey in a medium bowl; toss to coat. Add shrimp to pan; cook 2 minutes on each side or until done.

NOTE: I did this step differently. I skewered my shrimp and broiled them at 400F after mixing them in the juice/honey concoction.

Combine sour cream and remaining 1 tablespoon juice in a small bowl. Warm tortillas according to package directions. Place 2 tortillas on each of 4 plates. Top each tortilla with about ¼ cup corn mixture, about 4 shrimp, and 1 ½ teaspoons sour cream mixture.

Serves 4

Enjoy!!

Sour Cream and Onion Dip

This one comes directly out of Cooking Light’s August 2013 issue.  It was quite delightful and smooth. I dipped carrots, celery, lentil chips, and orange bell pepper.  The carrots and lentil chips were my favorite options. The dip was really delightful and extremely fast and easy to make. I highly recommend it for casual parties.

I did make some tweaks, though since the recipe originally called for canola oil (mmm..healthy…NOT) and canola mayonnaise.  See below:

1 teaspoon olive oil

2 cups finely chopped sweet yellow onion (it took me 2 onions to reach this- one large and one small)

1 tablespoon minced fresh garlic

¼ teaspoon salt, divided

1 cup reduced fat sour cream

½ cup safflower mayonnaise

2 tablespoons minced fresh chives, divided

¼ teaspoon ground black pepper (they originally used white, though)

Heat a small skillet over medium-high heat. Add oil to pan; swirl to coat. Add onion, garlic, and 1/8 teaspoon salt; cook 4 minutes, stirring frequently. Reduce heat to medium-low; cook 6 minutes, stirring frequently. Cool onion mixture slightly.

Combine sour cream, mayonnaise, 1 ½ tablespoons chives, pepper, and remaining 1/8 teaspoon salt in a large bowl. Add onion mixture; stir well. Top with remaining 1 ½ teaspoons chives.

Serves 12

Enjoy!

MANE-tenance Talk

In keeping with my theme this year to use and ingest more natural, quality products in my diet, I’ve decided to do the same with my hair.  Having my hair cut short has really given me an opportunity to see what truly works for my hair and what doesn’t.  There have been some surprises along the way. Below are some of the products I’ve experimented with over the past couple of weeks.

Moroccan Oil: Regardless of whether this is still a fad or not, I can honestly say that this doesn’t do anything for my hair. In fact, it really just dries it out. I’ve noticed over the past week or two that not only does my hair lose some of its curl when I use this, but mid-day, my mane is just looking shaggy as anything. I am not a fan.

Coconut Oil:  This was a surprise for me since I’ve been using this for a little while. Shockingly enough, this also does not do anything for my hair except dry it out in the end. At first it seems to really respond, but then it somehow falls flat. I used to put it on my hair the night before I’d shampoo it, but I noticed the last time I did this not only did it just kind of cake on my hair and not soak in, but my hair also kind of dried out a little bit. It was just weird. I am also not a fan.

Olive oil: Finally, something that works! My hair perks up and darkens nicely when I use olive oil. The only downside is I smell like a salad for a few hours.

Macademia Nut Oil: This one’s expensive, but man does it work!!  My hair really responds nicely to this. All of the curl comes back to my hair and it gets dark. I am a HUGE fan. This is my number one oil choice.

Yogurt:  I am also a HUGE fan of treating my hair with a yogurt mask. If you want some extra protein, you can add an egg or egg white to it and then put it in. This really worked. My hair grew a lot within the week after I did that. I’ve also used a yogurt mask with olive oil in it, and that worked nicely as well. What’s nice about the yogurt is that it is a gentle cleanser, it gets rid of dandruff, and if you have curly hair it gives your curls a nice boost. I highly recommend this treatment.

Honest Hair Nothing But Curl Wake-Up Spray: I’ll be honest—I’m not quite sure what this spray “wakes up”. I don’t really see a difference in my hair when I use this product and once I run out (it doesn’t harm it, it just doesn’t help), I probably won’t be buying it again.

Honest Hair Nothing But Curl Pure Pudding:  I L-O-V-E this product. Period. Yes, it does cake on after a few days and you have to co-wash it out or rinse your hair out, but it does what the wake-up spray probably should do.  When my hair is looking more fluffy than curly, I put some of this in and POW! I get some bangin’ curls for my ‘fro. This is a definite keeper.

As I Am Coconut Co-Wash: Perhaps it’s because of the coconut oil in it, but I’m not a fan of this. It really dries out my hair. I’m going to finish the jar, but once it’s done I’m going to be switching to Honest Hair Nothing But Curl’s co-wash and see how that works. Not a fan of this product.

What does “Right Speech” mean?

While reading one of Thich Nhat Hanh’s books (more to come on this in the next week or so), I came across his interpretation of the five precepts, which he refers to as the five mindfulness trainings.  One thing I’ve been really trying to work on is “Right Speech”, which is the fourth mindfulness training. I think Thay phrases it beautifully:

“Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful speech and the inability to listen to others, I am committed to cultivate loving speech and deep listening in order to bring joy and happiness to others and relieve others of their suffering. Knowing that words can create happiness or suffering, I am committed to learn to speak truthfully, with words that inspire self-confidence, joy, and hope. I am determined not to spread news that I do not know to be certain and not to criticize or condemn things of which I am not sure. I will refrain from uttering words that can cause division or discord, or that can cause the family or the community to break. I will make all efforts to reconcile and resolve all conflicts, however small.”

We are socially taught that it is rude or unacceptable to be silent, even more so now with internet forums such as Twitter or Facebook where everyone who is anyone is chiming in their opinion on everything.  A lot of these opinions are less than helpful, often uneducated, and frankly are just meant to hurt another person at any cost. To me it’s all a bunch of unnecessary noise.

Speaking has become so impulsive. I’m quick to realize that right speech doesn’t just come from my mouth. It comes from my frame of mind. I’ve noticed that as soon as a judgment or thought enters my mind, I’ve already begun to communicate it—not just through words, but through facial and bodily expressions and sensations. The idea of “Right Speech” is truly something more difficult to grasp than the simple, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all”. While this is certainly a piece of it, I think it goes a lot deeper. Simply closing my mouth and not speaking harmful words is one thing (and certainly helpful); however, it does not address the fact that I have not opened my mind large enough to accept what is in front of me.

Thus, I’ve decided to take this next month to commit to this mindfulness training seriously.  I’m going to strive to be more deliberate with my words and see communication as a helpful tool rather than something to be taken advantage of.

In the meantime I challenge you--The next time you are about to post something angry, condescending, or negative on the internet (or say such things to another person), I ask that you stop and examine how your body feels. Are you tense? Do you have a sick feeling in your stomach? Perhaps your chest feels tight? Feel the physical sensations. Then think of something nice to say. What does your body do? Does it relieve that tension? I challenge you to do the same thing when you read something mean that another person says and when you read something nice that another person says. I guarantee you there is a difference in the way your body reacts. Words can be poison or they can be medicine. YOU are the difference in how they are used. I ask that you please use them for healing. It makes the world that much better.

Gluten Free Zucchini-Walnut Bread

I made this absolutely delicious zucchini-walnut bread today.  When I say delicious, I mean my family and I (three of us) almost ate the whole thing in one sitting.  Moist and not too sweet, I made it to accompany dinner. I was really surprised that the bread actually rose (if you aren’t used to gluten-free cooking, not many doughs actually rise).  I HIGHLY recommend this recipe.  AND! It’s gluten-free. It’s not candida-friendly since it contains maple syrup, but it does have a good amount of fat in it and some protein (which is great if you are a fast oxidizer like me!).  Below is the recipe, which I tweaked because it was originally a Betty Crocker recipe and no offense to Betty, but she "ain’t" all that healthy.

Gluten Free Zucchini-Walnut Bread

½ cup pure maple syrup (if you don’t feel it’s sweet enough, you can still add up to another ¼ cup in order to get the equivalent of the cup of sugar that the original recipe called for)

2 brown, organic eggs

2/3 cup olive oil (If you aren’t using olive oil to bake, I suggest using it.  Your baked goods are guaranteed to always come out moist.)

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 ¼ cup gluten-free all-purpose rice blend (Note: I used one that already had guar gum in it, but if you are using one that doesn’t have guar or xantham gum, then add ½ teaspoon xantham gum to the recipe)

1 teaspoon gluten free baking powder

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

½ teaspoon baking soda

¼ teaspoon sea salt

2 cups shredded zucchini

½ cup chopped nuts

Heat oven to 350°F. Lightly grease bottom only of 9x5-inch loaf pan (I used coconut oil to do this and the bread slipped right out when it was done). In large bowl, beat maple syrup and eggs with electric mixer on medium speed until well blended. Add oil and vanilla; beat until smooth. In medium bowl, mix flour blend, baking powder, cinnamon, xanthan gum (if needed), baking soda and salt. Gradually beat into egg mixture on low speed until blended. Stir in zucchini and nuts. Pour batter into pan. Bake 1 hour to 1 hour 10 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool in pan 15 minutes. Remove from pan to cooling rack; cool completely, about 2 hours.

Enjoy!!!

My Entertainment Top 5 for 7/7-7/13: Hunter x Hunter, Blake Shelton, and more!

1. Hunter x Hunter- Yes, I’m an anime fan. Get over it. I’ve seen a few different anime series and the best way to impress me is to give me some action right in the beginning (although, I have to say that no anime does this better than Attack on Titan. You want to see some shizz go down fast? Just watch that. By episode 5 you won’t be able to pick your jaw up off the floor). I don’t want to mess around with basic character development (cough, Naruto, cough).  Hunter x Hunter has thus far been quite solid. I’d probably put it in my top 5.  The main character, Gon, while at first was a little on the annoying side (I think it’s the voice actor) has started to really impress me with his blatant honesty and his potential . The supporting characters (particularly Killua and Kurapika) are phenomenal and the plot is captivating. I highly recommend it if you are looking for something to watch. To say that I was sad when I finally caught up is an understatement.  I want more now. I’M SO IMPATIENT!

2. I think this video pretty much speaks for itself.

3. This singer’s voice and the tone of this song caught my attention because of how different it is from other K-Pop.  I’m really into it.

4. Dexter- Another show that doesn’t screw around. The season premiere was good.  I wasn’t sure where it was going to head after last season’s finale, but I like the direction they are taking it, clearly reminding the audience that regardless of the nature of his targeted victims, Dexter is still a serial killer. I will be devastated once this series ends after this season.

5. I’m simply including this one because, well, I can’t stop singing “Bubble butt, bubble bubble bubble butt”. 

Bucket List: #70 Get a “Different” Hair Cut

Yes, I formed a bucket list.  There’s a ton of stuff on it too, so I hope to live a long life.

Some of you may be asking why something so simple is on my list.  Well, let me give you some background.  I’ve had my hair chemically relaxed since I was 13.  As a result, my hair has always been somewhat long.  Of course, this was mostly in response to the societal cues (in my community at least) that if you don’t have long, straight (and preferably blonde) hair, you’re unattractive. Thus, although not blonde, I tried to fit into the mold with straight, relaxed, shoulder-length hair that often times was scrunched up into a ponytail since I didn’t want to take the time to flat iron it.  It’s not that I didn’t like my hair, but I found it to be a lot more time consuming and difficult to take care of.  Not to mention, my hair can be quite fussy.  In the end, I’ve generally had the same hair style for over a decade. 

After 12 years of getting my hair straightened and noticing a severe decline in the health of my hair and my scalp as a direct result of the chemicals, I felt it was time to move on. Last October after my final relaxer, I vowed to grow out my natural mane and never look back.  The original plan was to leave my relaxed hair in until my new tresses grew out to a long enough length.  I decided I definitely didn’t want a mini-fro and wanted to avoid the fro in general.

Well, as most transitioning individuals know, you reach a point when you just can’t handle the “half and half” anymore.  After my impatience and frustration peaked this past weekend, I decided I’d had enough. I couldn’t style my hair anymore- I couldn’t flat-iron my hair or I’d risk damaging my new growth and I couldn’t pull it back anymore because the new growth wasn’t being pulled back.  Not to mention, I couldn’t get to my new growth to properly take care of it.  I decided this would be the perfect opportunity to do something particularly “daring” and step outside of my comfort zone. Time to upgrade my look and knock off something on my bucket list. I took some scissors and cut out the relaxed hair. For future reference, I don’t recommend this strategy. The next day I got it trimmed up and evened out and now I’m rocking the best afro ever. 

I do confess, however, that I can still feel some anxiety over the whole thing. Over the past few days, this has challenged me in a numerous ways and some insecurities about myself have surfaced. This is why this particular task landed on my bucket list.  I wanted to challenge myself and prove to myself that I’m more than my hair or even my look. I wanted to stop and see how I react to such a significant change. Do I wallow in self-pity, drowning myself in criticism? Or do I own it like the fierce woman I am and meet it head on, seeing it as a learning opportunity to strengthen my mindfulness and Buddhist practice? I’m starting to come around to the latter and to my elation to boot, I have some of the best curls I’ve ever seen.

 

Be mindful. Be strong. Be fierce.

Summer 2013: Unleashing my Inner-Socialite

The food, the friends, the cocktails- I’m finding that this summer has been all about showing off my inner-extrovert.  Although this typically happens to me during this season, I’ve found this year seems to be inspiring some definitive changes in my life.  Perhaps it’s the realization that I’m one year closer to 30 or maybe it’s the new, more “zen” me that isn’t as attached to her insecurities.  Either way, a layer of my ego has been peeled off and an inner self has emerged—and she is fierce.

From a new hairstyle to new music tastes, to meeting new (and some old) friends, I’m excited to say that I don’t think I’ve found life this intriguing and free in a long time.

I’m very excited to be implementing a new format to this blog that will hopefully keep ya’ll abreast of what’s going on in my life, and will be fun, helpful and (if I’m lucky) thought-provoking. 

Meet my B.F.Fs- Al and Coco

Al Mond and Coco Nut, that is. OK, cheesy, I know (mmm…cheese…).

Well, it’s week five on my metabolic typing/gluten free/candida free diet.  It has been a struggle, although I don’t have nearly as many of the “OMG I CAN’T ANYTHING! WHAT CAN EAT?!” freak out moments as I used to.  I also am noticing how much I don’t miss a lot of fruits, vegetables, and candies that I thought I couldn’t live without.  So, what am I trying to say? It’s getting easier.

Two things that have been my crutches in this diet are almonds and coconuts.  Seriously, I never realized how many things you can make out of both of these things. Flours, oils, milks, not to mention the regular nut or fruit. And the best part? They are extremely healthy for you!

I do stick with my original consensus, though, that the path towards better health is not for those weak in will and determination. There are a lot of moments (often on Fridays after my consulting sessions….) where I feel like I can’t do this or it’s just too hard.  Often times I think to myself, “I gave up all of this stuff and now there’s MORE?!” I’m starting to get the hint that there’s ALWAYS more—more limitations, more things to be careful of, more things to take, etc.  I’m starting to reach the point of wondering how far I want to take this path, and I think that’s key.  My advice to anyone looking to get healthier is to set a goal and then take it from there.

The great thing about this change in diet is that a lot of persistent health problems no matter how minute they are or I thought they were, are starting to surface and become more obvious, especially since other more temporary issues are starting to go away and get healed. I say this is great because now I can start to see what real damage has been done to my health, which ties into my personal goals.  Originally, I just wanted to eat healthier and have a better diet, but with more problems starting to become obvious, my goals are starting to change a little bit. I want to get to know why my body is reacting in certain ways.  The key here is to be flexible and remember the Buddhist teaching- the only thing that is permanent is impermanence. I also like to remember that just because I deny something to be true or deny that something is happening, it doesn’t mean that it’s not happening. I’d rather just admit it and fix it.  Ignorance doesn’t do anyone any good ever.

It’s funny.  Six weeks ago I would have told you that I was healthy and perfectly fine.  I still consider myself healthy, but now I know that there are kinks to work out. There are ALWAYS kinks to work out.

This week is all about increasing my fat intake (again…I just can’t seem to get used to that…) and starting to take some supplements that will hopefully further put my body back into balance.

I can’t stress enough to those looking to invest in a healthy lifestyle to take the plunge. Do your research. Definitely invest in a nutritionist or coach who can walk you through this stuff. It’s easier when you have someone who you can talk to and can help sift through some of the things that you are going through.  It’s not easy, but it’s well worth it.

Metabolic Typing- You Can Do It!!!

Well, as some of you know, I decided to bite the bullet (or lay off the peanut butter cups, whichever you prefer) and hire a nutritionist, which has led me to the metabolic typing diet.  For those of you who don’t know what that is, I encourage you to visit this website- http://www.metabolictyping.com/ and learn more about it. 

For those of you already struggling with the sacrifices of this diet (or are just trying to figure out whether it’s right for you), I hope to offer some insight. I’m currently in week two as a fast oxidizer, which means that I am a heavy-duty protein type who loves her fats.  And cue the top questions:

• What about the pastas??!?!?! I said the same thing. And not just about the pastas. I said that about fruits, vegetables, sweets, and every other delicious carb I could think of because you guessed it- I should not be eating a lot of them. Ugh.  Which I’m sure leads to your next question.
•  OMG YOU CAN’T EAT FRUITS AND VEGETABLES?!?! AREN’T YOU GOING TO DIE?! (Yes, I have gotten that reaction…several times). No, I’m not going to die and I can eat fruits and vegetables, just a very limited number of them (fruit- apples, bananas, pears, and coconut only) and a very small amount. And again, not everyone is a fast oxidizer or protein type. Many people are carb types or other types. My diet is not yours.
• But, aren’t you going to get a heart attack from eating all of that fat?! Well, yes, if I decide to only eat fast food burgers for the rest of my life.  However, based upon a very thorough recent study, saturated fats do NOT cause heart disease. Trans fats do. Also, I’d imagine it depends on where you get your saturated fats from.  After all, saturated fats can be found in coconut, avocado, etc.

So what have been the biggest struggles so far?? Well, obviously, sticking to the proper foods to eat. I should explain that once you find out what type you are (you answer a lengthy questionnaire), you get a food chart that tells you all of the things that your type can and cannot eat, which in theory makes it easy for you to sort through what to get at the store.  However, it’s not so easy in practice when you are craving everything deliciously salty and carbo-licious.  The good thing about my type is I get to eat fatty meat (bring on the bacon!!!) to my heart’s content. The bad thing is I don’t like the meat sweats.

Getting serious now, here are the biggest struggles of this diet so far:

• Going out and eating. I like to go out with friends every once in a while and I hate being that overly picky person who “just can’t eat anything off the menu because it’s soooo unhealthy”. No matter how true that is, it’s difficult to stick with the diet and eat within my constrictions (which for me also includes being gluten, dairy, and sugar free).
• Explaining the diet to others. I’ve come to realize that as a society we refuse to admit that our diet is killing us.  I can’t tell you how many people I’ve explained this diet to who drink aspartame laden drinks and eat those nasty frozen dinners and claim “oh yea, I’m healthy. By the way, I have thyroid issues and I’m overweight and my joints hurt and I’m taking every medication under the sun for it”.  People- YOUR BODY IS TELLING YOU SOMETHING. GET WITH THE PROGRAM. Stop feeding yourself crap and you won’t feel like crap.
• The cravings!! When they say that sugar is as addictive as a drug, I believe it.  It has been more than difficult to kick the habit completely.  I had cut down on my sugar intake a few months ago and thought I could handle this, but I have been massively proven wrong.  Thus, I tend to breakdown every once in a while (OK, almost every day…) and have some gluten-free chocolate chip cookies by Lucy’s (kids, don’t try this at home…but if you do, just know they are delicious).
• The cost. Of course, healthy food is expensive as all get out, but if you live in the central PA area, I can tell you that if you go to BJ’s you can get organic meats at a very good price. They aren’t grass fed, but they are hormone and anti-biotic free and if you’re looking to lessen the impact on your wallet, it’s the way to go.  I try and get some grass-fed meats in there too (maybe one or two steaks from Wegmans or Giant) just so I can be extra good on some days.
• Finally, the cooking.  I feel this will probably be a benefit after I get used to it, but as a person who doesn’t normally cook, I find this very troublesome.  I did try this weekend, though, to dedicate a day to cooking a bunch of food and freezing it as meals for this week. So far, so good.

OK, so if there are that many cumbersome cons why even try it?!  Well, I will tell you that even after a week and half I have had some great results.

• First and foremost, my hair doesn’t fall out nearly as much.  Remember how that was a problem in my past posts? I thought sulfate-free items would help…and they did, but it didn’t stop it.  The change in my diet has cut the amount that falls out in half. Incredible.
• Secondly, my scalp stopped burning every time I touch it.  Also incredible.
• Thirdly, I don’t bloat and have a “food baby” or if I do, it’s only in its first trimester. I have suffered from this for YEARS. Ever since my tweens I developed a food baby after every meal, which continually got worse over the years to the point that I can’t wear some of the things that I want to wear.  Abdominal exercises didn’t work. Eating less didn’t work. Drinking more water didn’t work. This works.
• Finally, detoxing.  I have been detoxing from who knows what, which can never be a bad thing, right?!

So yes, while the diet is so much of a change from before, I think it’s going to be well worth it in the long run to maintain a healthy body.  Thus, if you are thinking about trying this out, I encourage you to give it a whirl. You don’t need to be perfect at it right away. I know I’m sure not, but the results will be well worth the trouble and as time goes maybe you’ll realize that you don’t really mind life without all of that junk anyway.

(Oh, and bonus-did I mention that I lost three pounds?!)

Oh, Just Shut Up

I’m currently working my way through Pema Chodron’s book The Places that Scare You. This is my first experience with one of her teachings and I must say that my favorite part about it is that she is not afraid to talk about her “human-ness”, which is a theme I am very fond of.  I think that too often we see other people as non-human.  We don’t see what we call their imperfection or their hang-ups and struggles.  We just success, whether it’s in the form of money, power, monastic robes, or anything else we consider a sign of success, which leads us to believe that “they” are something different than  “we”.

So, in light of Pema Chodron’s ability to talk about her human-ness in her practice and her ability to be inspiring through it, I thought I’d share a little of mine in my practice with the hope that it would show someone else that we are all in fact human.

I have a very hyperactive and perhaps untrained mind.  No matter how much meditation or mindfulness practice I do, I find that afterwards my ego goes “full speed ahead”, racing with thoughts, judgments, fantasies, and waves of ridiculous (and often times imaginary) emotions.  Of course, this leads me to doubting my practice, which leads to more ridiculous thoughts, which leads to more judgments, and the cycle goes on. More and more, though, as I get caught up in these ego-based activities, I find myself becoming mentally exhausted by the same old routine. Sometimes as I’m driving, I find myself mentally (OK, verbally) saying to myself, “Oh my gosh, just SHUT UP already”.  It’s like being in a room filled with noise and all you want is a brief moment of silence.  In fact, that’s exactly what it is.

I think sometimes in my practice I feel like because I have this hyper mind that I’m not normal or “I’m not doing it right”. I don’t think that’s the case at all.  The mere fact that I get exhausted by the constant reel of jibber-jabber going on in this noggin of mine I think is a step in the right direction.  We are all human.  Whether you are poor, rich, tall, short, etc., we are all human and we ALL suffer.  I think that’s the most important thing to remember.  We all suffer.

So, the next time you find yourself wrapped up in your “human-ness” thinking that you just aren’t doing something right, just remember- we are all wrapped up in our human-ness.  You want the proof? Are we all thinking and feeling? Then we all have human-ness to contend with.

September in Review

I figured I would highlight some of my discoveries of the last month.

Literature: September’s feature was Thich Nhat Hahn’s Peace is Every Step.  Simple yet practical, this book suggests very basic practices for mindfulness. He recommends practicing smiling and concentrating on your breath in order to bring yourself into the present moment. Although written about 15 years ago, I still find this book to be extremely relevant and helpful. I highly recommend it.

Health: As some of you know already, this month came the revelation and the witch hunt to eliminate everything that contains SLS (sodium lauryl/laureth sulfate).  What is SLS you may ask? It is the foaming agent found in everything from toothpaste, laundry detergents, dish detergents, shampoos, liquid soaps (hand soaps, body wash, bubble baths, etc.), and even some conditioners.  It is a highly toxic chemical that has been proven in over 16,000 studies to cause cancer, skin abrasions, hair loss, and if in too much concentration, death.  Due to the low concentration found in our cosmetic products, it is not the one time usage that is of concern.  It is years of exposure that is the problem since the skin absorbs so much of the chemical over time.

After making this discovery, I took it upon myself to empty out my bathroom of all of the SLS-containing products.  I threw out the majority of them.  After silently weeping over the vast amounts of money that was literally just thrown away, I did some research on what some good products and substitutions might be.  Below are some of the winners:

Earthpaste: This perhaps is the best product that I have come upon yet. While making your own toothpaste is possible with some baking soda, water, and some flavoring oil for taste, I thought Earthpaste was more well thought out, containing essential oils to kill bacteria and using edible clay as a base so that it wouldn’t be harmful if you swallowed some by accident. All of the product reviews from Amazon and several blogs were positive, and I have to say I have not been disappointed.  I will admit that the color is a bit gross (brown), and it takes some getting used to because it doesn’t foam, but it does clean my teeth and mouth so much better.  It feels like I just walked out of the dentist each time.  Also, I have found that my breath is better.  I absolutely recommend this product.

Sulfate-free shampoo: I have a recipe for a sulfate-free shampoo that I will be trying after I’m done with this, but I don’t really have any complaints about this product. I got it at the Heaven and Nature store on Jonestown Road. It doesn’t have a particular name. You can simply ask for the sulfate-free shampoo and you will receive a scentless, paraben and sulfate free, 8 ounce bottle. You can add essential oil (10 drops per oz) if you want a scent or you want something that will clean the scalp of bacteria (tea tree) or help hair growth (rosemary). 

As expressed in past entries, I have been experiencing severe itching, burning, and hair loss for some time and no clue as to where it was coming from. After trying this shampoo, I will say that I have experienced an improvement-less burning/itching and less hair on the comb (although I had a setback last week after using a protein pack that felt like it was going to burn my scalp off...the rest of my protein packs went in the trash). I’m not 100% sold on this particular shampoo (as I said I will be trying a new recipe after I’m done with this), but I think it is definitely an improvement.

Bar soaps: I don’t have a particular recommendation here, but I have been impressed with the more homemade soaps as opposed to Dial/Dove/etc. I used a goat milk soap that I bought from Heaven and Nature and found that it was gentler on my skin and didn’t have any skin irritation as I have experienced from liquid soaps in the past. I definitely recommend switching to bar soaps.

Soap nuts: [Insert sexual joke here] The jury is still out on these. Soap nuts are pretty self explanatory.  They are nuts that have cleaning qualities and you put them in the laundry to wash your clothes. Supposedly they have been used for hundreds of years (cue cheesy sound effects) in other countries.  When you use them, they leave your clothes scentless and you don’t have to use fabric softener in the dryer.  I purchased a sample and tried them last night. I think I liked them. I will say that they have a vinegary smell to them once they get wet, however, once the clothes go through the dryer they don’t have a smell. You can get soap nuts in liquid concentrate and then add a few drops to water, which I think I’m going to try.  I didn’t like throwing the nuts (which were in a drawstring bag) right in with my clothes because I wasn’t certain that they were washing the whole load.  So, jury is still out and I’m open to other options.

I think that’s about all. Til next month!!

My Trip to Red Bank

Last weekend I would have recently returned from my brief getaway in Red Bank/Sea Bright/Holmdel, NJ.  There were quite a few places that I had the opportunity to visit, so I thought I’d document them here in the event that any of you are looking for a relatively short distance trip to the beach.

I stayed at the Oyster Point Hotel in Red Bank for $149 per night. I checked in on Thursday evening and left early Saturday morning so I could return for a concert in Hershey that afternoon. It was a nice hotel.  It was clean and modern.  They had a restaurant that overlooked the bay area (the hotel was right next to the bay), although I did not eat there. Based upon the rest of the clientele and the look of the place, it was apparent that it was more of a business destination.

I give the place an A on hospitality. All of the staff at the front desk was very nice and engaging. I will say, though, I didn’t like that the staff would come in during the evenings to drop off cookies on my night stand.  It was unexpected and I just don’t like people walking in and out of my room when I’m not there, especially with my stuff all over the place. It simply doesn’t allow me to relax into the room.

My room was clean and was really nice. The bathroom was a little small, but the bed was comfortable and it was clear that things were well-kept. The caveat? It was extremely noisy at night. This was a complaint on Tripadvisor too, but I tend not to take many criticisms on public forums too seriously.  The first night that I was there I kept on waking up from the noise of the traffic on the highway near the hotel. I might as well have been sleeping on the shoulder of the road. Furthermore, I could hear consistent bumping and banging out in the hall and in other rooms. The second night this didn’t bother me much since I had tired myself out from the day’s activities.

Finally, location.  The hotel is a little too far from the antique/restaurant stretch of Red Bank to walk.  However, there is quite a bit of street parking there, and it is free after 6pm.  The set-up reminded me of downtown Carlisle.

Over all, I’d probably stay here again if I had to. I think the price was a little steep based upon the noise alone, but I’d pay it again if it meant that I’d have a clean room and didn’t have to pay $300 just to stay right next to the beach. Call me crazy but I’m OK with staying a few miles from the beach if it means saving me a few hundred dollars.

The first night I was there, I ventured to Raritan Bay Waterfront Park in South Amboy (thanks, Rich!!!).  It was a really well-kept park that was right along the water.  It had a really nice walking/running stretch right on the beach if you like some scenery.  I don’t recommend swimming/tanning here. 

I ate at Blue Moon in South Amboy. The menu and food was nothing to shout about.  I ordered a roast beef classic sandwich.  However, I really enjoyed the laid back ambience.  It was a cozy bar.

The next day I drove to My Kitchen Witch in Monmouth Beach for breakfast, which was about 7 miles from my hotel. It was delightful!!! It is half café, half smoothie bar. Both have a healthy-eating focus.  They advertise which foods are gluten free, vegetarian, vegan, etc. I ordered green tea, the multi-grain pancakes, and their thick, classic bacon. Everything was delicious. The pancakes (2) had the texture of cornbread. They were thick and they came with grapes on top.  There was syrup on the table and they gave you a pat of butter. The bacon was also phenomenal.  I saw everyone raving about it on Tripadvisor, so I thought I’d add it as a side to see what the big deal was. They put brown sugar on top and so you have the sweet and salty thing going on, and the slices are definitely thick.  I highly recommend this place for breakfast.  The smoothies looked delicious as well, but I didn’t have enough room to try one.

After breakfast, I headed back down the street to Sea Bright beach, which had advertised free public parking.  I was lucky enough to get a spot around 11AM since they were filling up fast. The beach tags cost $8. It was clean and I found that for how many kids and families were on the beach, it wasn’t that loud.  Also, people were friendly. A lot of people brought coolers with them, but if you were like me and didn’t think that far ahead, there was small place right off the beach called Woody’s that you could get hot dogs, fries, ice cream, sodas, water, etc. There were also bathrooms right off the beach.  I really enjoyed my experience at this beach and will definitely keep this place as a consideration in the future.

For dinner I went to Phole, which was a Vietnamese restaurant in Red Bank.  It was OK.  I’ve had better pho.  I ordered the vegetarian kind.  Also, don’t get the bubble tea.  What is bubble tea you might ask? Good question. It is a tea-slushie with flavors (I chose mango) and large balls of tapioca (hence the “bubble”).  Call me old-fashioned, but I tend to like my drinks to be completely liquid.

On Friday night, I went to the Jason Mraz concert at the PNC Arts Center in Holmdel.  I really liked the venue. It had inside seating for the folks who paid for the assigned seats (like me) and they had a really nice lawn for folks who paid for outside seating.  The only complaint that I have is that I wasn’t allowed to bring my camera in.  Now, I wouldn’t complain if there wasn’t a significant amount of people who had cameras my size (large) and smaller in the venue once I got in. I’m not sure how some of them got them in because it was clear that they couldn’t hide it anywhere on their person.  I was actually pretty upset about this and still am. I don’t mind having to leave my camera in the car, but don’t tell only a select portion of the people to not bring their cameras and let everyone else in.

That about wraps up my trip.  I definitely recommend Monmouth/Red Bank/etc. as a destination point.  It was quaint and enjoyable. I know I want to go back.

August: Month in Review

Well, I didn't get around to sewing as much as I wanted, but I did want to share that I finally ended the project that I started in March. Let me just say that it was not a "simple sew" project as the pattern had stated.  Simple sew perhaps for folks who know what they are doing, but not for beginners.  Nonetheless I am still proud for having finished it.

It has its fair share of mistakes, but over all I'm very proud.  I still intend to start and finish another sewing project; although, I doubt that it will be finished by the end of this week.

In other news, my month of reflection after my Buddhist-intensive month has also been less successful than I wanted it to be. I simply have not had the time to meditate as often as I would like and I have found that my sense of self has gotten a bit out of hand lately.

Next month's theme will most likely go back to one of a spiritual nature while October will focus on cooking.  More to come...

Month of Zen Concluded

This month has by far helped me to re-acquaint myself with the foundations of Buddhism.  Rodney Smith provided deep lessons and several takeaways that I think will aid me on my path toward a more connected and enlightened life (I highly recommend the book- Stepping out of Self-Deception).

This next month I will be focusing my attention on sewing and absorbing my lessons I just learned.  I simply think it's pertinent to give myself an opportunity find my own way without having to be constantly guided.  Of course, I'm sure that by the time the month is over my sense-of-self will have taken over and all of the lessons I just learned will be skewed. At least I tried.

So! First up will be to finish the tank top that I posted a picture of a couple of months ago (it was only half completed).  All it needs now is a zipper and few touch ups and it is set to go.  Pictures to come!!

Namaste!

Black Hair Product: Cantu Shea Butter

Before I start this review, I want to say that I think I have *almost* found the key to doing my hair.  I have found in the last couple of months that the less product, the better.  And!! The product that I do use cannot be heavy and has to be some sort of oil or combination of oils.  Otherwise, the petroleum based substances and heavy creams tend to cake on my hair and scalp giving me a dirty, greasy feel in hours after washing/conditioning/flat ironing. It’s annoying and it’s harmful to my hair.

The caveat? I have noticed that my scalp’s health has been deteriorating quickly. While my ends and color has been looking stellar, I’ve noticed that my hair has been thinning at a rapid pace.  I’d rather not go bald at 25.  My scalp gets extremely irritated-tightness, burning, some (painful) itching, which I cure by putting oil on my scalp, but I find that my hair still falls out.  I started using Dr. Miracle’s Hot Gro cream today (petroleum based with oils) and I’m going to give it two weeks with an application everyday (may the divine help me) and see what happens.  I’ll post with my results.

However, my scalp and hair woes are not the point of this post (although, if anyone has any suggestions re: the hair falling out, it would be MUCH appreciated!!).  My point was to review Cantu Shea Butter: No Drip Hair and Scalp Oil.

When I first got it I was attracted by the fact that it was not petroleum based.  It is simply solidified oils. I can tell you right now I have not been disappointed.  It has been one of the best hair product purchases I have made in a very long time.  I primarily use it on my scalp, which I find is the best use for it. It doesn’t drip all over the place (although you do have to watch that sometimes the oils do liquefy in the bottle and when you first squeeze it out it’s all oil) and since it is light oil and not petroleum based, it doesn’t cake on my scalp and hair making it greasy.  I find that it evenly distributes throughout my hair as the days go by to the point that I don’t have to worry about putting on product throughout the week. My hair is shiny and dark and styles really well with it.  It has become a part of my routine.

Downside? The applicator tip is awful and it’s actually really hard to squeeze the stuff out after awhile.  The bottle is a firm plastic so when you have a flat iron or comb in one hand and are trying to put the product on, you can’t squeeze stuff out easily.  I find that I have to squeeze the product out first on the counter top or my hand and then go from there.  Also, as I mentioned before, the oil does tend to liquefy a little bit at the top, but it’s usually not an overwhelming amount.

Overall I really recommend this product.  It’s light, it smells great, it works great.  I will definitely be buying this again.

Grade: A-

Buddhism: Interconnectedness

And this week’s post…

Interconnectedness.  This has been the focus of my practice this week. I’ve been thinking a lot about how we are all connected to each other and to other (non)living things. For example, for the past couple of weeks I’ve had the strongest urge to plant flowers, vegetables, anything as long as I got my hands dirty. Finally I caved yesterday and bought myself some seeds and some dirt pellets to get started (late in the season, I know).  However, as I thought about it, this urge fits into my journey towards interconnectedness. My energy in planting the flowers and helping them grow is essential to their well-being just like the production of their vegetables and oxygen are necessary to mine. However, it doesn’t end there.  With that little plant I am also impacting the bugs and insects, soil, and over all air quality for others. Through the mere action of me placing a seed in some soil, I am impacting the lives of so many.

In the wake of this horrible tragedy in Aurora, I think this lesson of interconnectedness is also incredibly important.  The fact is this wasn’t just a heinous act committed on a group of people.  It was something committed on everyone. Furthermore it was committed by someone in this global community. His actions are felt by victims’ family members, friends, loved ones, his own family members and friends, as well as neighbors, bystanders, and people who are otherwise unaffected but may feel heartache after reading about it in the news. Tragically, this disgusting and violent act is felt by so many because we are all interconnected. (Side note: My sympathies and prayers are with everyone who was directly affected by this.)

While interconnectedness has been the theme of my spiritual practice this week, I would like to also mention something that I read this morning in Rodney Smith’s book.  He was talking about how often times our minds fool us into believing that we are experiencing the heart’s desire of compassion and, yes, interconnectedness when in fact we are simply experiencing something that the mind has made up.  He followed this up with examples such as “nice substituting for kindness” and “seriousness substituting for sincerity.”  I admit that often times I am wondering if it is my heart or mind ruling a situation and sometimes I am easily sucked into believing it's my heart if I find that I am incredibly happy or feeling slightly generous one day.  However, I think the key here is to always question where thoughts and actions are coming from.  Even if they are truly from the heart, always question and investigate and be mindful of when the sense of self comes into play.

This coming week is the last full week of my intensive refresher on Buddhism. I’m slowly starting to think about what my next month’s focus will be.  I will probably be focusing on something a little bit more mundane-perhaps sewing?

Well, until next week! Namaste!

Buddhism: What is this moment?

This is actually last week's post, but I forgot to put it up here.

Last week my re-acquaintance with Buddhism took its all familiar turn toward confusion and muddled lessons.  The biggest problem I have in my practice is often that I twist or forget what I'm supposed to be doing.  I find that when I focus on my spiritual practice, it's so easy to delve into other aspects-religion, the metaphysical, guardians, guides, etc.-that I forget I'm simply here to experience the moment.  Of course, the Buddhist peer or teacher would probably say this is my ego attempting to distract me from itself and I would wager that this is most likely accurate.

While my practice appears to be losing sincere focus, I can say that my meditation and daily mindfulness practice has begun to bear some fruit.  Although still not easily identifiable, I've begun to recognize my own conditioning and its inherent suffering.

Two Sundays ago I was watching this video about Buddhism and the narrator was talking about "identity."  He mentioned how we tend to define ourselves by our permanent identity and yet we don't have one.  There is no permanent identity that moves from one moment to the next.  So, what are we holding on to exactly? I thought this was the perfect embodiment and teaching of the three lessons/realizations of Buddhism: 1) all is suffering, 2) all is impermanent, and 3) nothing has any self.

Rodney Smith's book taught me two lessons last week.  Firstly, and perhaps the most important because I'm often wondering how will I know if my actions or words are wise or unwise, ego serves my needs based upon fears and desires.  Thus, if my words or actions are based from my fears or desires I know they are coming from an unwise place.

Secondly, Smith talks about how our conditioning teaches us to resist our fears and things that are contrary to our  beliefs.  He says to overcome this resistance we should simply surrender to the moment.  To be honest, I'm not a fan of the word "surrender".  I prefer to simply say "drop my barriers."  I think it more accurately describes what is happening or what Smith describes is happening.

As I muddle through my murky lessons of no-self, suffering, and impermanence, I will leave everyone with these two questions- "Who are you? What is this moment?"

Buddhism: Increasing Awareness and Questioning my Sincerity

Last week I found myself trying to increase my awareness and identify my sense-of-self in my everyday activities. Even now I am aware of my mind thinking about what I’m going to do after I write this post instead of embracing the stillness of Now. By doing this, I’ve been able to see how often I move away from my suffering as opposed to towards it, and I’ve been amazed how often my mind tries to uncover or create a problem in my heightened awareness where this is none.

Rodney Smith’s book has continued to keep me on track and question my conditioning. I think most importantly he has provided me with reference points where I am able to identify where I am on my path and what I need to do to further my progress.

One of the more interesting things that he has mentioned is how our minds are constantly creating mental alternatives to our reality and seeking solutions to problems that are non-existent. It is the smaller conflicts of agitation, worry, restlessness, etc. that cause us the most suffering because of how they build up over time. As a result of these conflicts, the mind desires to manipulate a person’s reality because of perceived discomfort. For example, a person is agitated because a room is too cold, so she desires to change the temperature. In this particular scenario the person has perceived that the cool temperature is a negative thing and as a result has grown a negative attachment. Thus, as a result of this attachment, the person has developed agitation, a form of suffering. If the person were to examine the feeling of the cool temperature without any positive or negative attachment thereby letting go of her agitation, she would find that she would have no desire to manipulate her reality to suit her.

I think the biggest lesson I have learned (this week) from Smith is to question everything. The very essence of the Dharma is to hold a questioning attitude toward everything and rest on the certainty of nothing. Even in determining one’s practice, you have to question what you are doing and for what purpose. Smith mentions that even then there are only certain questions that come out of wise view. Those questions that start with “what” and “who” are much better than “why” or “how”. My take on it is that asking the question of “why” assumes that the subject of the question, which we have perceived through our unwise view, actually is. Thus, “what” is more appropriate because you are re-examining your perception of the subject and thus are able to reexamine your attachment to it.

The lesson that has me thinking the most this week is Smith’s words on sincerity and intention. He describes people as having 2 intentions in their practice-one that comes from the heart (primary intention) and one that comes from the mind (secondary). The primary intention, as Smith defines it, is always peace. The secondary is your mundane desires, conditioning, and suffering. Ultimately, you have to come to the realization that your primary intention is more important and forego the desires of the secondary. This is not always easy and frankly, this is what determines how serious you are about your practice. Of course, this has me thinking about whether I am able to do what is necessary and if my true intention toward enlightenment is strong enough. Have I ultimately experienced enough suffering from my secondary desires to know the value of peace?

This week I will be continuing on my month long dedication to Buddhism. Stay tuned for more insight. Namaste!

No-Self: Re-Examining my Perspective

Lately I have been disconnected and disenfranchised with my Buddhist practice, not because I don’t agree with its fundamentals, but more because of my frustration in what seems to be a lack of growth and commitment. As a result, I decided that I would take a month to refresh myself on what Buddhism exactly is and perhaps figure out where I am leading myself astray.

I have started reading Stepping out of Self-Deception: the Buddha’s Liberating Teaching of No-Self by Rodney Smith. With just three chapters in, I have to admit that I have already found many errors in my own practice. My perception has been all wrong.

In the first chapter of this book, I received my first “Aha!” moment. Smith talks about how we are not possessors of our minds, but rather our minds form “us”. Our minds created how we see ourselves, along with everything else in our lives. As Smith so aptly states, “We exist only because the mind thinks us into creation.” Thus, we cannot see ourselves as separate from our minds. We are whole. When we see both as separate, which we often do, we create a competition and divide between “ourselves” and our minds, which ultimately leads us down a path of suffering.

This idea of separation translates into how we approach our spiritual and everyday lives as well. There is this idea, and I am guilty of this too, that we must compartmentalize our spiritual lives and our secular lives; however if “the call of spiritual practice is to examine and understand what we are” and if we are to truly obtain a Wise View, how can we separate our practice from the way we live our lives and still obtain our spiritual Enlightenment? The answer is simple-we can’t. We have to come to understand that the sacred lies in the Now.

Smith also discusses something that I am admittedly guilty of and I know that several others are too, which is infusing Buddhist items and symbols with sacred meaning. This perception only inhibits us because we only feel spiritual when we interact with these items and practices. As I mentioned in the previous paragraph, Buddhism is not inhabited in any particular experience or item. It is inhabited in our general experience and perspective.

Finally, I think one of the most important things that I have read so far is Smith’s view on meditation, which is most certainly a practice that I have been struggling with. He describes meditation’s purpose as informing us about the true nature of relationships and interconnectedness. When aligned with these principles, we “lose our self-centered perspective, abandon our defenses, and release ourselves into the intimacy and ease at hand. There are no goals or direction, there is nothing for the self to feed upon, and everything is represented equally. The experience itself is sufficient. In meditation the struggle is that we feel less self-fulfilled but more spiritually fulfilled. To the sense-of-self, meditation may become frustrating because there is not and never will be vindication of our efforts. Frustration indicates we are caught in an unwise view.” This is extremely important. I often times create a “goal” out of meditation- what do I want out of it? What am I aiming for? Smith indicates that in itself, there is no goal other than to experience and at some point realize interconnectedness. To get frustrated or to aim for anything else is the sense-of-self (also called the ego self) calling out, which leads us away from the path we are trying to walk.

Each day I struggle with where I am in life and where I want to be, how to get there, etc. (As Smith would say, my sense-of-self is creating a problem and I am operating very much on a horizontal plane as opposed to a vertical one.) Ultimately, I’ve recently come to the resolution to simply live each day as the person that I want to be and to somehow rise above any situation and act in a way that I would be proud. While it sounds good, I realize that in this statement alone, there is an abounding sense-of-self. How do I change that? When I ask that question, I can feel fear well up inside of me as my ego screams, “Are you trying to get rid of me?! You can’t live without me!” It’s undoubtedly a scary thing as I have not known anything else but my interaction and life with my ego self, which is comprised of every decision I have made and every perception that I have. It’s hard to imagine that I would get rid of it. Or would I get rid of it? Perhaps I am making an assumption that shouldn’t be made.

Smith begins this book by talking about how Western Buddhism has forgotten about the Buddha’s ultimate teaching of no-self, instead concentrating on “sacred” items and practices such as meditation and retreats. I tend to agree. Often times when I am explaining to someone what Buddhism actually is, the words can’t seem to come to me. The words “lots of meditation” always seem to come to my mind, which tells me that I have fallen into the same trap that Smith describes. I can say that by reading his book, I find more depth to Buddhism and its meaning—something that I have been desperately looking for (or perhaps have just simply forgotten). The no-self lesson is the ultimate lesson of Buddhism—to escape the damaging perceptions of the ego self, which instigate suffering and pain—which will ultimately lead to the place of Enlightenment and the ability to truly experience awareness and the present.